Wednesday, May 31, 2006

既然曾经拥有, 何必在乎天长地久?

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; but in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight." (Proverbs 3:5-6)

Today is May 31st. That means it has been more than 5 months since Eric and I split up. Back then, the life that Eric and I shared was the only life that I knew... I always thought I was gonna marry him someday. So when things ended so tragically, I was devastated. I couldn't understand why he put me through it... or rather, why God put me through it.

That day at the AYA Festival (February 2nd 2006) was a turning point (CLICK HERE to read all about the AYA Festival). The Lord spoke to me... Spirit to spirit... to stop trusting in my own carefully laid plans and ask Him to show me His. I prayed and asked God to gimme someone who could love me with all his heart and soul... I asked Him to show me who my life partner was.

Over the next few months, my future began to unravel like a cheap sweater. I finally understood that God was behind it all. He was the one who closed the door on my relationship with Eric, and He'd done it for my own good. I was overwhelmed by the thought that the God of the universe was willing to be involved in the details of my life - that He'd be willing to reach down and shut a door that He didn't want me to walk through.

I didn't understand at 1st but thank You, Lord. I know You took Eric away because You had someone better for me...

I remember the day Rogers and I met up for the 1st time (on February 9th 2006) since ages ago. Around that time, I began to see Rogers in a new light. His kindness and the gentleness of his soul caught my attention. He began to pop up in my thoughts and prayers. I looked forward to the chance to see him and talk. I remember how we grew fond of each other, how we fell in love, our 1st date, our 1st kiss, our 1st trip together, the 1st time I met his friends, the 1st time he met my friends, the day we met each other's families, our romantic moments, etc... =')

When Eric left me, I thought I would never love anyone else again. But Rogers is my answered prayer... ^_^ I'm so blessed to have Rogers in my life as he's everything I'm looking for and more... and believe it or not, I knew him since I was 13! It's funny that I never quite looked at him that way all these years... until February 25th 2006, the day we held hands and realized that we were each other's better halves.

I've always wanted someone who puts God 1st in his life... a person who truly understands me and appreciates me for who I am... someone who's respectful, loving, caring, honest, kind, faithful, witty, cheerful, gentle, patient, loyal, understanding, intelligent, and mature. And he must NOT be the flirtatious type of guy who has many female friends throwing themselves at him. Oh, he must be musically inclined too... ;D I have a fetish for musicians... especially bassists... *drools* It's amazing how nobody else but Rogers fits the abovementioned criteria... ;P God really does work in mysterious ways... =D

Baby might be going to Korea next year. We are most prolly gonna break up before that cuz I never believed in long-distance relationships. He would be gone for 3-4 years... so I dun wanna be a burden to him. But I'm gonna submit this relationship to God... cuz I know that only He can hold this relationship together.

From now until then, I'll cherish every moment I spend with him... I'll cherish his smile... his laugh... his kisses... the way he looks at me... =') I will cherish every funny comment he makes too... =) So that when he leaves, there'll be no regrets... and whenever I think of the day we 1st said "I love you" to each other... that very second and moment in life, everything seemed perfect and I can hang on to that one moment in my memory as THE moment when I can truly say "I was in love". After all, it's better to love and lost, than to never love at all...


When I'm with you,
Eternity is a step away,
My love continues to grow,
With each passing day.

This treasure of love,
I cherish within my soul,
How much I love you,
You'll never really know.

You bring a joy to my heart,
I've never felt before,
With each touch of your hand,
I love you more and more.

Whenever we say goodbye,
Whenever we part,
I know I hold you dearly,
Deep inside my heart.

So these seven words,
I pray you hold true,
"Forever And Always,
I Will Love You."

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