I'm so haunted by him.
Sometimes I laugh at a memory.
I just miss him, that's all.
These are the things that have been haunting me since I went to Poppy Garden and The Loft - Upstairs with him last Wednesday night:
- the time he visited me in the hospital
- the time we had cocktails in Hartamas
- the time we went to pasar malam together in Ipoh
- the time we bought cheese cake ingredients together
- the unforgettable look on his face when I ambushed him with the bass guitar last December
- the time we ate chicken liver, chicken feet and gizzards together
- the time I went to Genting Highlands with him
- the time I went to Cameron Highlands with him
- the serious look on his face when we played Uno
- the way he looked when he sucked the soya milk from the bottle
- the time he covered me with a blanket when I fell asleep in his living room
- the time he covered me with his sleeping bag when I was freezing in Genting Highlands
- the way he cringed at the mere suggestion that I wanted to drive his car
- the way he laughed at my jokes
- the way he looked when he was making my special cheese cake with me
- the way we sang along to sappy love songs in his car
- the amused look on his face whenever he saw a bapok (a male to female transsexual)
- the look on his face when he talked about his fav Powerpuff Girls umbrella
- the look we exchanged when we shared an umbrella under the pouring rain
- the way he looked at me when I half-jokingly begged him to pour me a glass of Baileys, Chivas and JD
- the way he looked when he ate the strawberries we bought together
- the time we watched The Benchwarmers in the cinema
- the time we watched Talladega Nights in the cinema
- the nights we watched movies together at his house
- the time we watched funny clips together on his PC
- the times we listened to jazz music together in the morning and at night in his living room
- the times we walked around in shopping malls
- the time he overslept and I had to wake him up for church (we were almost late)
- the time we checked out beautiful hotels in Ipoh
- the look he usta gimme whenever he passed me the Caltex sticker to stick onto a redemption voucher (to redeem the Powerpuff Girls umbrella he had always wanted)
- the times he wiped his car's windscreen the wrong way
- the times he helped carry my bag for me
- the time we browsed thru books together (and laughing at certain chapters) at the Popular bookstore in Ipoh Parade
When he calls me on my celly, "Nothing's Gonna Change My Love For You" is played.
Whenever I miss his voice, I would watch the video of his singing "Now & Forever" on my celly. He sang that song on his guitar last October at his place.
After bawling my eyes out for a good 2 hours, I switch on the lights.
I wrap my arms around my legs and rest my chin on my knees, staring at the candles he gave me.
The last song on the CD ends.
I turn off the lights again, unable to withstand the memories that come flooding back.
I lie there in the dark, trying to drown out the deafening silence which slowly envelopes me.
I hate the silence.
I hate his silence.
What I Hate About Him
I hate his constant inability to express his feelings and emotions.
I hate the way he talks to me.
I hate the way he styles his hair.
I hate the way he drives his car.
I hate it when he stares.
I hate the cute way he grins.
I hate the way he reads my mind.
I hate it when he makes me laugh, even worse when he makes me cry.
I hate that he's not around, and the fact that he didn't call.
And mostly I hate the way I don't hate him,
Not even close,
Not even a little bit,
Not even at all.
But do I still *heart* him?
Like... when you lose a leg and try to scratch it.
He was my gangrene infected, amputated limb.
[EPISODE 2]: CLICK HERE ~ Runaway Vacation + The Benchwarmers
[EPISODE 3]: CLICK HERE ~ What REALLY Happened...
[EPISODE 4]: CLICK HERE ~ *Riding In Cars With Boys Equals A Crazy Night Out*
[EPISODE 5]: CLICK HERE ~ *Riding In Cars With Boys: The Sequel*
[EPISODE 6]: CLICK HERE ~ Time Flies When You're Having Fun... ='(
[EPISODE 7]: CLICK HERE ~ Mission #2 [UPDATED]
[FINALE]: CLICK HERE ~ At this moment...